Freedom of expression - in all forms
How do you allow your horse to express themselves? And if you do, when?
I often sit and reflect upon this. Because allowing your horse to have the freedom of expression and feel the safety to do so, is hard. I wish it wasn’t, and maybe to some people it isn’t. But the truth is, this is not what mainstream society has taught us to be around horses. Most traditional training is a dominant leadership style, and as much as we might love our horse, we still have expectations and a desired outcome. There might be 101 ways to get to this desired outcome, some nicer than others, but do you allow your horse to express themselves along the way?
How often do we allow our horses to express their emotional, physical, mental or spiritual needs? And I wonder, when we do allow this, is this in a moment of observation or free-play, do you ever allow this during a training session? How much harder is it to allow your horses to fully express themselves in a session with them. We humans put a timeline on everything, we have expectations and goals and our ego that gets in the way. So our horse expressing their displeasure at an aspect of your training - well that is inconvenient for most people. So we either ignore it, or plainly don’t even have the awareness to see it. Not only this, but a horse who has been ignored or punished for this expression will stop showing you all together. So maybe most people don’t even know this is an issue. What an interesting thought to have.
This goes both ways though. You have to see the good, the bad and everything in between. I’m not just talking about listening to your horses and their displeasures. Have you ever listened to your horse and see what brings them contentment? What does your horse enjoy doing, or learning? The subtleties of these expressions can be so small that you might not even know what you are looking for, but once you start listening, they will find ways to express themselves more.
You can see in this video, Oberon decided that he wanted to walk at a greater distance from myself and the group this day. It was hard not to let my own emotions overwhelm me. I love when he walks with us and feels a part of the herd, this is something we personally can find challenging. So to have a day where he said “no thank you”, was hard for me personally, but great for our relationship long-term. I’m allowing him to express his needs in those moments and not projecting my own agenda on him. We can’t expect our horses to be in a certain emotional state every single day, we aren’t, so why put that unrealistic pressure on them? This is mutual trust in the making, even if it feels like my own ego is telling me it is a step backwards.
So if you take anything from this post, it is to reflect on the question. How do you allow your horse to express themselves? And if you do, when?
The next step is to start seeing these expressions, for everything they are, even if you don’t like what you see. But maybe that is a challenge for another day.
- A lesson from Oberon